CIY

Normally, I am always pretty excited about CIY. and this year I am excited, even though it will be different because I will be a sponsor and Wayne will not be there, and neither will Kristin and Cana and Monica and all of my other lovely friends. Just in light of recent events I am not in the most, optimistic, of moods. But I think that is the perfect mood to be in because I think I am ready to be broken which is the position that I want to be in for this spectacular week. But I also don't want to have too many expectations.

Which, I've realized, only causes heartbreak and broken expectations in the end. I am learning, the hard way, to live with uncertainty. God is truly teaching me to live and wait and trust in Him and that I can't figure everything out as much as I would love to be able to. And as much as people disappoint me I will continue to look for the best in others if only because of those times when human nature truly does surprise me with the good in people. I think that as Christians we can be generally optimistic, and are almost called to be optimistic, because we know that with God there can be no failure of plans to work out, if only we trust in his plans. Which is what I am learning, slowly. So here's to a week of CIY. In any case, I get to see Wayne, which is the happiest moment of the month, probably. Besides when I get to see Kristin. :)